Cluttered House, Cluttered Mind?

Posted on by Judy E Martin

I may have mentioned that at the moment I am going through quite a bad bout of anxiety and depression. My head feels like someone is wringing my brain out, and there is not enough room in it for all of the thoughts that are going around and around. It is really tricky even trying to string some  coherent thoughts together at the moment! It really seems like my head is full of clutter, which is funny really as. looking around my house is pretty cluttered too!

Now don’t get me wrong, the house is quite tidy, but everywhere I look there is stuff! Under the coffee table is jam packed with sewing magazines (I havent done any sewing for ages), all of the shelves in my front room are covered with photos or ornaments, my kitchen draweres are full to bursting with odds and sods, and the bathroom is stocked with enough toiletries to keep me going until at least next Christmas (not that I am complaining)!

I have two wardrobes chock-a-block in the bedroom but nothing to wear, an overflowing knicker drawer and shoes galore at the bottom of my wardrobes, and under the bed, oh yes, and in my ottoman at the end of the bed. It is like a lucky dip whenever I go in there, to get a pair out as it takes me forever to find the matching one!

The problem is Mr Grump is like it as well! He has got a box of hats on top of his wardrobe (everything from pork pie hats, to flat caps and an assortment of sun hats)! He also loves shoes and there are loads under his side of the bed although he only ever seems to wear one or two pairs.

If that wasn’t bad enough Miss Hap has also joined in the tradition! She has shelves of books, and video games as well as all of her hair stuff and makeup. She has now decided that she needs to minimalise her room, but that is not going to be an easy task.

If you were to look in my loft, you would find nearly as much stuff up there that I can’t bear to throw out, as in the rest of the house. I am a very sentimental person and have only just started throwing greeting cards out. I have kept them all for years and years. I also havee clothes of all different sizes up there that I will never wear, along with some baby clothes of Miss Hap’s that I cannot bear to part with.

I am wondering if maybe I should start being a bit more ruthless and chuck out some of this stuff.  What about you, do you live in cluttered chaos or minimalist with no mess?

 

 

 

 

81 thoughts on “Cluttered House, Cluttered Mind?”

  1. Get rid of the outsized clothes for sure. If you lose a lot of weight, you’ll want the joy of shopping. I get rid of stuff all the time. I am happier with a neat house and less stuff.

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  3. A little at a time, Judy. It’s a New Year, so today pick one item and either donate it to charity or sell it on eBay, GumTree or Music Magpie. Tomorrow choose two items and do the same thing. Carry on through out the month of January and you will have 496 less items in your house by the end of the month.
    I was once addicted to selling stuff on eBay, but now I get a huge sense of pleasure from donating stuff I no longer need, to charity.
    Good luck with it and let us know how you do. 🙂

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      1. lol, I’m always rummaging around in my drawers and am always amazed at what I find 🙂
        You’re welcome, Judy. Believe me when I say that the feeling you get when you do declutter is something that really can lift the spirits. I hope it works for you.

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  5. Sorry to hear you are still not feeling well. Anxiety and depression are hard to cope with but my own experience is that clutter will not help. But nor will trying to do too much at once. Manageable bite sized tasks work better for me plus trying to concentrate on what I have got done rather than on what’s left to do. There has been lots of good advice posted here. I hope it helps and that you start to feel better soon. I find Christmas can be a difficult time as routines slip and days run in to one another. May the new year bring better times.

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    1. Thanks Wendy. Yes, I have started on tidying out my bedroom drawers for now and that is enough for today. I do find myself worrying over all I have to do rather than what I have done, but am trying to change that way of thinking. I have had some fantastic advice, and great support here too which has been lovely and much appreciated. 🙂

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  6. I am visiting kids sisters etc. Flying from one place to another. I have accumulated so much i had to check carry on and pay over weight fees so I will be de cluttering when i get home . Clutter does bother me a lot.

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  7. I suppose that I’m somewhere in between purger and keeper. I keep what I think will come in handy later and chuck the rest. I once read that anything you haven’t used for six months should find a new home. I can’t stand the kitchen being untidy. My wife is definitely chucker and stasher. She will throw things away if she has no need of them but stuffs drawers with other things.
    Currently we have our house up for sale as we are looking to downsize, so everything is going. Ebay, Pre-loved, charity shops and the local tip are doing really well at the moment.
    Good luck with the clearing but be careful, it can be addictive

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  9. Hi Judy, just catching up after being away and would like to give you a hug and say ‘i know, I know!’ I live with a hoarder. Love him to bits (must do, we’ve been married for forty-six years in 2016 – and yes, I was a child bride!!!lol) But this year will be the big sort out – have persuaded him to give/ sell/ throw stuff away once and for all – so charity shops and car boot sales it is then!. Mind you… he has been promising this for years. So I may have to resort to the sly stuffing of black bags and going to the re-cycling site and charity shops on my own … again! Keep positive, Judy, you write great posts that I enjoy. Jx

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    1. Thanks so much for the encouragement Judith. Poor old Mr Barrow, he sounds a lot like me, and I think you are going to have to be strict with him, or even sneaky in order to get rid of some of the stuff. I shall be be roping my husband into it too, as he is almost as bad as me! :-)xx

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  11. Pretty minimalist here apart from the textilistes material boxes. Have fun if you can bear a clear out. My mum never could and when my brother and I emptied the house when she moved after dad died it sprang from its foundations and ran off

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  12. From the ‘Queen of Clutter’I go along with Sue Vincent – ‘fold, tidy and recycle’ but only chuck if you really can’t stand the object!
    I have listened to those minimalists and thrown out stuff only to regret it later.Great for them – not for me. We are all different – not better or worse, just different! (I do a lot of crafts and clutter is like my painters palette) Get some good big storage boxes (plastic box company is good) then have a KEEP, CHUCK, RECYCLE and DON’T KNOW box. The DON’T KNOW box needs to be at least as big as the rest – probably bigger. Set aside a day, get an empathetic friend to help if you can, and have a treat lined up as a reward! Don’t let ‘shoulds’, ‘oughts’and feeling guilty get in your way – in fact give up guilt forever!That’s the first thing to chuck out!! Good luck! ❤

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    1. I am going to try and ditch the guilt Daffy, as well as a lot of the stuff that I don’t need. Some of it might have to go up in the loft if I really can’t bear to part with it, but I have got far too many things hanging around! 🙂

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  13. Uh oh! Now you’re stepping on my toes! lol When I saw the title, I thought “Why is Judy writing MY blog today??”
    You already know my answer. Cluttered mess.
    sigh
    Maybe THIS year is the year!! I’ll get it all cleaned up, and never have to deal with it again!!!
    Bwahahahaha! Look for me in the padded room, when you come to visit…

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  14. Every once in a while, I start feeling clogged, Judy. My house accumulates “stuff” and all the good energy that should be circulating through the space coagulates and gets heavy. I almost never throw things away because I think they may be useful. But I’m getting really good at giving things to charitable organizations. Start really small, and when you have a box filled, drop it off so that it doesn’t become just more clutter. You will feel so much better 🙂 Good luck to you!

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  15. I share your pain… Start small… Undies drawer… Then socks… And only your stuff… Don’t get hooked and not the rest of the family’s gear… Be kind to yourself… You deserve it. Xx

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  16. I understand what you mean about the clutter making your head hurt. I feel the same way. This time of year our house is so full with decorations and gifts and party goods that it sometime feels overwhelming. My favorite time is the day all the holiday decorations come down. All the surfaces are clear and open. It make me feel calm. I am a anxiety organizer anyway. When I’m anxious or worried the first thing I do is clean and straighten. I hope you find a way to ease your mind. Maybe start small and add up the little victories.

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  17. I’m not naturally a purger – I’m more of a putter. As in I’ll just put this here for now…

    I can say that it does feel much better every time I see a load of crap I’m not using leave the house.

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  20. I purge. I’m a purger. I like living in my small house with only x amount of space (especially nice when cleaning) and if I don’t purge then my house will feel crowded and messy and I can’t cope with a mess.
    I appreciate the good Feng Shui I get when I purge — make new spaces for new things to come in — and not necessarily things at all. Too much clutter, not enough chi.
    I suggest to you Marie Kondo’s books. Does it bring you joy? Have you created a space to honor it? Very valuable lessons in clearing.

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  21. I am a minimalist on all things with the exception of books, which I have a terribly hard time giving away. My husband is a packrat who if he had his way would keep every item he has acquired since the third grade. I’m slowly teaching him to part with “things” in exchange for saving money for “experiences” (trips). Now we buy zero knick-knacks and instead put the money away for our next adventure. I do think that, for me at least, a clutter-free environment is more soothing and relaxing. Judy, I hope the anxiety and depression lets loose of you soon, my friend!

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  22. I lean toward clutter but I am married to Mr. Clean so maybe we’re a good match. I know just how you feel, though and cluttered home definitely results in cluttered mind. Consider having all three of you participate in a good giveaway. Choose some things you really don’t use but don’t have the heart to throw away and donate it to a good cause. I don’t know about the U.K. but here we have any number of organizations who will happily take preowned items that are still useable. If you can work together in this “goodwill” effort, it’d be a great way to start the new year more clear in home and head! Good luck.

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    1. Thanks Debbie, Yes we have a lot of charity shops that take stuff, and in fact my husband works for one of them as a driver, so I am sure he can take a load of it into work. All three of us doing it will be great, and should clear a lot of space! 🙂

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  23. Can’t offer much I’m afraid as the boat has limited storage. We have the necessities, basics, and ‘our precious stuff’ but obviously a lot of the ‘other stuff’ had to go. However, when we had space, we worked on a system that ‘if we hadn’t used it in 6 months, we didn’t need it’ so could discard it to a charity shop or car boot sale accordingly. Of course we came unstuck a few times, but generally it worked out OK!
    Hope you start to feel better soon now that the adrenaline rush of Christmas is over and a New Year is on the horizon.

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    1. Thanks so much for your support. Yes I can imagine that space is pretty limited on a boat and you had to be very strict with what you took with you.
      Hopefully. I will be able to get rid of some of my stuff at least.
      🙂

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      1. You’re not alone, and when depressed, sometimes it feels that way.
        We were surprised how little we actually needed once we were ‘installed’ aboard. Now, if it’s not in the car or the boat and we’re not wearing it, we don’t have it!

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  24. Oh, Judy! If I was there I would help you go through all of your stuff. I am a neat freak. Maybe it was because of all the kids we had back in the day, but I learned to get rid of the piles. I have crochet magazines (in a box in the closet) that I can’t get rid of so I understand your sewing ones. I do use mine though and love spending time just looking at what I want to make next. Hope it works out for you. It always feels good to get rid of the stuff you don’t want or use any more. Happy New Year! ❤ ❤ ❤

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    1. Thanks so much Colleen, I do want to do some sewing, just can’t muster up the motivation at the moment to do it! I will be going through a lot of my stuff though and paring down!
      Happy New Year to you too 🙂

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  26. It might help calm your mind more if your house is less cluttered.But I also am often attaches to stuff, so if I throw something away that I apparently wasn’t ready for yet, I might feel bad for a long time. Also just threw some cards away that I received many years ago. I often have multiple ‘cleaning rounds’ througout the year. Whenever I have the impulse to do it. I can’t get rid of too much stuff at the same time and this helps against the empty feeling. However, my mother always thought that I never threw enough away when I was a kid. For shoes, I had to throw a lot away, because I wasn’t able to wear them (I need really good walking shoes, otherwise I can’t walk a little bit, because of physical issues). I had multiple shoes with heels (sandals, boots etc.) because I liked them and I hoped I would ever be able to wear them. I had them for many years and it took too much space (I think it were 5 pairs). Eventually, I was able to threw them away. Kept one pair that I really loved. It’s ok if it takes some time to get emotionally detached from it. With clothing I’ve become a lot easier over the years. Have I worn this in 1.5 years? No? Is it a special thing (like a gala dress)? Am I going to wear it now? Are there no holes or anything in it? Etc. Often won’t keep it and because I realized I never really liked it or wore it once 3 years ago, it’s a lot easier for me. 1.5 or 1 or even more years is really long. And I give my stuff away to charity, that helps too.

    I hope you’ll feel better soon!

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    1. Hi Mel and thanks so much for coming over. I think I will be getting rid of at least some of the stuff that I haven’t worn for ages, and also several pairs of shoes that are too high. I am sure having a bit of space will help clear my mind a little at least.

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  27. Oh Judy! Firstly big Ritu-Style Kentish (((hugs))) for you.. I so hope you feel better soon hunny.
    As for the decluttering, I totally understand, and yes, it would be a great thing for you to do… But alas,I am like you too… Wish I could follow my advice too, but I also have piles of ‘stuff’ everywhere!
    Maybe if you start in one place, and conquer that demon, it’ll be easier to get on with other rooms?
    I know it runs in my blood, you should see my mum and her treasure/clutter… Then there’s mine, and my children are the same!!!

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    1. Yes, that is my main problem, not wanting to get rid of my ‘treasures’ but to be honest, the piles of stuff everywhere is getting on my nerves. Whether it is because I am not feeling too great at the moment I am not sure, but I am going to try and get rid of some of it at least! Thanks so much for the hug too, very much appreciated 🙂

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  28. I understand you, Judy, and I can tell you that de-cluttering your personal space will do wonderful things for your mind and spirit. I have a very cluttered brain and if I find myself in surroundings that are physically cluttered, it actually hurts. I’ve always been an organizer, maybe for that very reason. It does take time, but once you start, you will begin to feel so much better. Start with just one closet or desk and go from there. Make 3 piles…to trash, to keep, to give away (charity).It really works. I wish you the very best. ☺

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  29. Oh Judy! First I really hope that you are soon better! I don’t like knowing you in that state for so long. Then again when I read your post I understand…. I would have panic attacks!!! I am definitely rather the opposite. I might throw out things earlier than sometimes healthy. Perhaps this all has to do with my many movings (if this is a word). I only keep some greeting cards which really are from certain people. At times I clean out my wardrobe from stuff I did not wear for years… that gives me reason to buy more new stuff… lol
    Love you lots, Sis! The days get lighter again and perhaps you only need some more sun light.

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    1. Thanks Erika. Yes I was hoping that I would have felt better by now actually, but I am still very much up and down. Still, I am getting treatment for it. I have decided to try and clear out some of the clutter as I am sure that doesn’t help matters! 🙂

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      1. I think when you see how much you achieved and feel that relief of getting rid of so much stuff might give you at least good feelings, sis! Feel strongly hugged 😘😘😘

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  30. I feel your pain, really, so let me start with a big warm hug.I’m messy and a collectionner at heart so My place used to be filled up with too way too many things. A book really helped me : The life changing art of tidying up by Marie Kondo. I also started using a planner to help me keep track of things and see reality as it is. The website “Unfuck your place” is a good source too. I hope you’ll find the answers you are looking for.

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  31. Since everyone moved out… there were a lot of us at one point… I have been gradually getting rid of ‘stuff’. When the last of them went I pretty much needed a skip (though actually most of it went to charity or on ebay). You have no idea how good it felt to be able to open a cupboard without a deluge 🙂 If I could afford another skip though… there would be more to go 🙂 Much more… just because I like the space better ( plus it takes less housework) 🙂

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    1. I think I need to get rid of some of this stuff. I do try and have a mini spring clean and pare down a bit but it soon builds up so I think I will have to be a little more strict! I like the idea of cupboards that are easy to open and don’t spew their contents at you (the airing cupboard is the worst, we have a stepladder that flies out of there whenever it is opened)!

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