TJ’s Weekly Household Haiku Challenge – House Number


Remote Controls (1)

I was wracking my brains for what to use for TJ’s household challenge this week as our prompt is ‘house number,’ Mine is not as fancy as TJ’s pretty enamel one so I thought of other numbers around the house instead, as he suggested.

I decided that the TV remote controls were a good choice. Plenty of numbers on there to be getting on with!  Wales are playing Scotland (who England beat) in the 6 Nations Rugby Cup today, and Mr Grump is glued despite his constant snuffles, snorts and sneezes spoiling his enjoyment! (Man flu has arrived and he is actually really poorly)!

Anyway, here is my haiku!



Hogging the controls

Channel surfing drives me mad

Is it a man thing???




Episode 353: The Power of Technology!

Thus morning I actually had a lie-in and didn’t get up until 9am which is unheard of for me! Nobody else was awake as we had a bit of a late night and after the other morning I decided to just let everyone else sleep in, especially as it is Mr Grump’s birthday today (yes he is another year grumpier)!

Anyway, I went into the bathroom, and the light didn’t come on, so I thought the bulb had gone, However, on going downstairs, I realised that we had a power cut and nothing was working! Oh, this is novel, I remember as a little girl we used to have quite a few power cuts and Mum always had some candles and a torch handy so at least we could see!

Seeing as it was well into the morning I didn’t need any of those, but I did want a cup of tea. Luckily we have a gas cooker so I just boiled up some water, no problem. I usually go on my laptop early on but with no internet or electricity I had to give that a miss. Hmmmm, what to do?! How did we amuse ourselves before technology took over the world with its hypnotic powers, drawing us in and keeping us occupied?

I went on my mobile and looked at my notifications from Word Press. I had a few comments so decided to reply to them, only to realise that I can’t send it as I have no internet. Now what? I know, I’ll play Candy Crush on my tablet, I am doing quite well with that. I started playing but then realised I had to connect in order to progress, but I had no bloody internet, damn it!

I am not very used to silence either, I always put the TV on first thing to watch the news for a while whilst I catch with reading some blogs, but of course that was out, so I read for a while. I do read a lot but never in the daytime, preferring to relax just before I go to sleep by reading a good book. I did enjoy the 20 minutes or so before the power suddenly burst back into life, but felt really tired!

The others finally got up soon after and although Mr Grump does not like to make any fuss about his birthday, we gave him his presents and sang ‘Happy Birthday’ to him which I think he enjoyed. Miss Hap is at a friend’s tonight for a sleepover so we are going to have a nice quiet night in together.

As it is his birthday I bought him the latest ‘Lord of the Rings’ DVD in 3D which he is watching now, and I haven’t even moaned about it once! I hate those bloody films and just cannot get into them at all. He is sitting there though, as happy as Larry, Roxy not far away from him as usual. What a shame it would be if there was a power cut now!

Episode 148: Family Night…..

The weekend is upon us. The time for families to spend quality time together enjoying each other’s company….not in our house!

We all started off sitting together in the front room having dinner, then Miss Hap got a call afterwards from a school friend, She decided that they needed to ‘face time’ each other as talking is obviously not enough (neither is the fact that she was just with her at school a few hours previously) and she clomped off upstairs to get some privacy!

I remember those days when younger and my friends would phone on the weekend. My Mum and step-dad would moan loudly about ‘bloody kids’ phoning up when we only saw them 5 minutes ago. We didn’t have the luxury of a cordless phone and the cable wasn’t that long either. That normally meant sitting in the front room trying to talk to your friend whilst getting withering glances from the others as you were disturbing their TV viewing pleasure!

Privacy was not an option. If you were lucky, you might be able to yank the phone out to the hall and sit on the stairs for 5 minutes, before being yelled at to ‘get off the bloody phone’ – even if your friend called you! Those were the days!

Mt Grump has plonked himself in front of the (blaring) TV  with a few beers, to watch the Rugby. It is England V Wales, and is being played in his home town of Cardiff. The rest of the family are English, and he has been getting a few texts from them commiserating over Wales’ inevitable trouncing by England even though it hasn’t started yet! In fact we are being treated to a light show of dizzying brilliance.

I am sat at my laptop trying to block out the bloody racket coming from the TV. My headphones have blocked out about 50% of it, but no doubt I will still hear the shouts if Wales score, or the swearing if England do!

Good old technology. where would we be with out it?…..Probably all sitting around playing a board game and spending quality family time together no doubt!!!

Episode 137: Trial By Jeremy Vile: Helpful or Humiliating?

Ah the good old chat show! Don’t you just love them? How things have changed from the good old days of ‘Ricki Lake’ and ‘Oprah’. Oh yes, they sometimes got heated but then ‘The Jerry Springer Show’ burst onto our screens complete with bizarre guests, and punch ups galore! Compulsive viewing, to start with as it was just so shocking.

Over here in the UK, we have got good old Jeremy Kyle, Some of you might have already heard of him. He just loves to get right in people’s faces, and wind them up, calling them stupid, or telling them to go and get a job etc. Then gets out of the way was they are about to lash out. He is very agile is Jezza!

God knows why anyone would want to go on TV and air their dirty laundry but there seems to be no shortage of guests ready and willing to put themselves up for humiliation, not just by him, but by the press who occasionally latch on to a story associated with the show.

I have to share with you, a couple of extracts from a conversation between Jeremy, a female guest and her ex-boyfriend. It went along the lines of:

Jeremy, “So you sent pictures of your private parts to another woman on your phone?”

Ex, “Well I had a bad day at work!”

Jeremy: Why did you get arrested for harassing her?”

Ex, “Because I harassed her!”

Now I get the fact that the show is trying to help people; It  offers after care services,  for all manner of problems, addiction, child contact centres, financial help and the like, but they really have to go through the ringer in order to get it!

Jeremy is very often condescending; takes the mickey out of the guests, and shouts in people’s faces. Not to mention his favourite expression is for men to ‘put something on the end of it’! Now that is a catchphrase to be proud of!

Do you think these shows are really helpful, or just titillation for the viewers?

Episode 126: Tired of Not Sleeping!

What do you do to entertain yourself at 3am in the morning when you can’t sleep? It is so annoying You turn over, and over trying to get comfortable…then you need the loo so you stumble out, eyes half closed, get back to bed and…ZING! You are wide awake. That’s the situation I found myself in this morning….

Apart from the fact that I was resentful that both Mr Grump and the dog were snoring contentedly, I was cross because I had a day off and could have had a lie-in (I never do anyway, but in theory I could)!

So it’s off downstairs as there is no point in trying to force something that is just not going to happen. It’s a little chilly downstairs, so I put the kettle on for a nice cup of tea. I don’t however, turn on the heating otherwise the clanking and banging noises it makes as it fires up will wake everyone else up. Anyway I’ve got one of those snuggle blankets with the arms in!

So now what can I do? Well I can catch up with a bit of TV that Mr Grump won’t entertain watching. I particularly enjoy a programme where this ex-hotelier (now bankrupt and unemployed), has been employed as ‘Entertainments Manager’ at another local hotel, as the owners saw his fly on the wall series a couple of years ago when he ran his own hotels (obviously before he lost the lot)!

Anyway, this guy is so funny, as he spectacularly buggers up everything he touches, even though he tries so hard. It makes me laugh, and if I can’t sleep, I might as well be sat there giggling. I flick on my laptop and have a couple of games of ‘Candy Crush’ whilst I am at it as well!

I know some people like to get on with a bit of housework if they can’t sleep but that would not be a great idea where I live. I am too noisy and clumsy to start dusting especially if not fully awake. Plus the walls are so thin in my house that I would have half the square knocking my door, not to mention Mr Grump and Miss Hap, baying for my blood if I dared to vacuum.

No, I didn’t fancy living dangerously,  so I opted for a couple of hours watching telly and playing on my laptop, I was then ready to go back to sleep, which I did… a really deep sleep, so deep that when Miss Hap came in to have a snuggle before school, I woke up with a splitting headache, feeling disoriented, and in a nice bad temper! Oh, and still tired despite eventually getting enough sleep!

What do you do when you just can’t sleep?